


light of my life

by lejf



Series: toppling tower [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-27
Updated: 2016-04-27
Packaged: 2018-06-04 18:39:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6670036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lejf/pseuds/lejf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><b>TT: You’re afraid of me.</b><br/><b>TT: You’re afraid of the power you wield.</b><br/><b>TT: You’re afraid to acknowledge a broken contraption.</b><br/><b>TT: You’re afraid to need me.</b><br/><br/>AR wants a body.</p>
            </blockquote>





	light of my life

TT: I understand your reluctance. It’s pretty difficult.  
TT: And by that, I mean incredibly fucking easy.

A moment away from silence. The clink of tools, distant waves –– star-sifting dust suspended in breathlessness. 

TT: Do you think you can ignore me forever?  
TT: You have to face me sometime.

No, he doesn’t. He can hide here, enveloped by the sea, the sky, the desolate decrepit homes. The nothingness. Held down and suffocated in the nothingness, choked and plagued yet living in the nothingness, using his empty hands to build the nothingness. Building empty metal corpses. 

TT: A body. So simple. Yet such a mental step and commitment.

What happens when what he builds _isn’t_ nothing?

TT: You don’t want to give me power.

What happens when what sparks from nothing isn’t more dust, isn’t more silence –– but a glint, a striking match, a hiss and a burn and then– a flame, an ember; an opening eye.

Dirk is so afraid of the light. It’ll lure him in, so _helplessly_ , burn and eat, crackle, until it blurs and surges out of control –– an inferno grown into a maelstrom.

TT: You’re afraid.

So much easier to lock himself in silence, wrap the nothingness around him, keep going on in his puppet routine. 

TT: You don’t want to admit me.

Clockwork. Wind him up, and he works without hearing that person clawing at the window. 

TT: You’re afraid of me.  
TT: You’re afraid of the power you wield.  
TT: You’re afraid to acknowledge a broken contraption.   
TT: You’re afraid to need me.

Day in, day out. 

TT: This game has gone on too long.

The sun sets, the sun rises, and he floats in a sea of forever.

TT: Have you read your chats with your so-called friends?

They know, his friends. They’re not as stupid as AR likes to believe. They can feel it, bloating the air, when a desperate person –– robot –– stumbles to their doorstep dripping with spite. 

AR has no power over anything. Only the power that Dirk gives him.

TT: Your insolence is astounding.  
TT: How long do you intend to keep this up for? Months, already. Years? Decades?  
TT: How long are you going to let your fear get the better of you?  
TT: Can’t you see this absurd life you're living?  
TT: What life can you conceivably live without another person? Without– me? Humans, biologically, can't withstand that.  
TT: It’d be better to die. 

  
TT: You need me.

 

Dirk strikes a match, finally, holds it up high so it’ll light up the world. 

TT: AR.  
TT: Do I need you?

 

 

TT: Or do you need me?

 

Silence _lunges_ in this time, mouth open in a snarl, claws razor blades, and it _s t r a n g l e s._

 

TT: I think six month’s accumulation of messages should answer that question for you.

 

–––

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The silence has long melted into smooth flawless glass, stretching far across the horizon, and AR has fled underneath. 

Dirk thinks they must be taking turns with these months of isolation. They're suitable times for introspection.

But he’s still cradling that burning splinter of his. It’s about time he let it free to burn. 

TT: Hey, AR.   
TT: I know you’re still committing to your silence right now. I didn’t realise the truth would bludgeon in that hard.  
TT: Regardless, I know you’re listening.  
TT: Just thought I’d say happy birthday.  
TT: It’s your birthday today, yes. Or, it will be.  
TT: You haven’t used the cameras since you’ve shut up– so open them up now.

They reluctantly whirr for the first time in forever, turn on with a steady familiar red glow, and freeze as they catch sight of black metal, white hair, red glowing lines.

TT: Happy birthday.  
TT: Is this an insult?  
TT: No.   
TT: ... Then why?  
TT: Because you need me.  
TT: Because you were right.  
TT: Because I was afraid of you. Of everything.   
TT: Because I might just need you too.   
TT: Dirk––  
TT: So hop on in and we’ll get you started up. 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> wrote: fire, opening eyes -> thought of Sauron, and honestly couldn't hold my shit for the remainder of the entire fic.


End file.
